COWROAST CHRONIC(le)

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A short edition of the Chronicle today  but the last 48 hours have been v exciting for me as you will see below. (Of no interest to anyone else however)

We've been having a little online auction amongst the boaters on our mooring-mainly as a result of my shed clearance which revealed a reasonable collection of stuff donated to previous auctions which remained either unsold or, more probably uncollected. I'm very pleased with the outcome so far. After only 2 weeks and 9 Lots we are fast approaching £100 which we'll be sending to the Ian Rennie Hospice in memory of June Pearce, whose funeral was on Tuesday. It was a simple service as June would have wanted-no fuss-but after the Committal a large mainly black butterfly flew round the Chapel-no significance? I like to think not.

It was good to see Bill and Sue at the Crem, I do miss them on the moorings but life goes on, and Bill very kindly presented me with a cheque for £25 for the hospice. He, for some inexplicable reason, didn't want any of our valuables but did request that the electric car seat cover** which was unsold, should be given to his nominee. So Roy will be comfy driving round the M25 next Winter. And I had a nice hug from Sue, always one of my favourites; why she married a Brentford supporter God knows. (I wore my Fulham tie which is black with a small motif. Bill wasn't over-impressed.) Mike and Judith (another star in my Firmament) and Daphne and Chris off Frobisher also represented the boating fraternity. Daphne, whose birthday is today, told us she had had her bottom looked at and it "would see her out". Always a comfort to a boater. Happy Birthday Daphne.

** This means an electric cover for a seat of a car, electric or otherwise (Pedant's Revolt)

The garden continues to give pleasure as does the empty shed which is very handy on warm sunny days and evenings.

Another boat crew is moving on. Peter and Christine are giving up their mooring at Cow Roast and moving onto the Leicester section of the Grand Union. So much change and none of it pleases me. I do hope they come and see us whenever we have a gathering...or even when we're not!...maybe in August when The Griffin crew are down? Just a thought....

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My book is released. Very pleased. Even if nobody reads it at least I've had the satisfaction of finishing it and getting it into print.

"My Life and Other Jokes"

After countless hours of scratching various bits of my anatomy interspersed with a bit of two finger typing the worst book ever written has been published, albeit by me because nobody else could be bothered.

If you're looking for a short, pithy read to change your life, improve your cooking skills, enhance your wellbeing and broaden your horizons then I'm sorry.

This book is none of the above except it is short. It rambles through some of the more boring bits of my life (there are no other kind) and includes a litany of jokes most of which you have heard and gratefully forgotten.

 The main value inherent in this book is you can read it on a car ride from Bristol to Luton (unless you're the driver), a flight to Malaga (unless you're the pilot), an afternoon sat on the beach (unless you're the Lifeguard) or sitting in an airport lounge waiting for your cancelled flight home to be replaced.(Unless you were diverted to Perpignan on the trip out). 

On second thoughts don't bother with the book but get yourself a treat at Duty Free.

AVAILABLE FROM AMAZON (Kindle £2.50 or Paperback £5.50)

or from me: mikewall@cowroastlock.co.uk....(plus p&p)

Have you heard the one about?  You don’t hear people tell jokes anymore (unless they’re short phone texts) and this book reminds us of what a good joke is about. All interwoven with the life of a shaggy dogger. No, it’s not an illegal practice-it’s a man who misses the days when you’d hear the words “Have you heard the one about?”


I am very grateful to friend, Philip, who applied his considerable editing skills to my final draft. He's due a very large fish supper (other meals are available) and to Natalie who contributed an item of her artwork which I have always admired. Not having an artistic cell in my body I was very pleased to include it.

http://www.natnicklin.co.uk/

If anyone actually gets round to reading this gibberish-the book I mean-please find time to review it on Amazon. Unless you hate it of course in which case shut up.

That's it for now. Told you it was short.