Special Wedding Supplement

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Let's start with the Wedding!

The boys and girls worked so hard to get the Chilham Village Hall ready on the Friday.

The tables were all named after Faversham pubs!

It had to be a Pashley Darling!

The bike was used to signpost the entrance to the hall. I was deputed to bring it from Faversham but had so much stuff in my car I couldn't get the tailgate fully closed so secured it with my belt; an arrangement that worked well till I arrived at the hall and had to greet the assembled with my car keys in one hand whilst the other was attempting to hold my trousers up. A grand entrance.

 The Champagne is on ice

Saturday started with thunderstorms and I had to use the brolly whilst loading the car with champagne.

I reflected that it would be most unsatisfactory to be struck by lightning whilst carrying full bottles of Champagne. I uttered a silent prayer mid garden "Please God Let me at least be struck holding an empty one"

To Church with the lovely Pamela, Mother of the Bride. Pam was doing a reading, "Daffodils" by Wordsworth but seemed very in control....as always.

The Bride is on her way....

A very groomed Groom

 

The Service was lovely,  conducted expertly in faith and sincerity by The Rev Tracey Bateson with readings by Andrea May and Pam. Both excellent as were Florence and Neve the Bridesmaids

Trying to get Pam and her offspring in one shot was like herding cats but it's quite an achievement to get them in the same county. We nearly got Natalie in this one-she is just off to the left.

The Reception which included an excellent hog roast was very relaxed with plenty to eat and drink, good music and no casualties

Brian and Gill, Philips' parents enjoy the sunshine with the Lady of the Manor

Pray silence for the father of the bride

Pam is still delighted by the wonderful bunting made by friend, Annie Robson

All and sundry pronounced the day a great success; the weather could not have been kinder, the assembled throng more jolly or well turned out and the principal players all performed wonderfully.

It was grand to see so many kids enjoying themselves to the full and adding greatly to the day. They are, after all the future and what is a marriage about if it is not a tangible acknowledgement of hope in our future.

Well done everybody. Cracking Day.

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We had booked a cottage on the outskirts of Chilham, Kent where the Reception was to be held. Arriving on the Monday we were blown away by the loveliness of the accommodation, the gardens and the surrounding area.

You're never more than a hop from a hop in Kent

Our humble abode

Chilham has two pubs, the White Horse and the Woolpack (which has accommodation-much of it taken by wedding guests)

I had an excellent steak in the White Horse on our first night which was great value at just under 12 quid. The second day, Tuesday,  was spent buying Champagne and sunning ourselves in the garden. Somebody has to do it. In fact Tesco in Faversham did not have sufficient Bubbly for our needs so we were told to return the following day . In the evening we met Caz, Philip and Florence at the White Horse for a drink followed by a very fine barbecue back at the ranch.

Wednesday and it's hair to be cut and toenails to be painted. I can't remember who had which but we met up afterwards and went in search of Champagne. Faversham Tesco had sold out again (What recession?!) but the very helpful Michelle established that the Whitstable branch had what we required and would save it for us so  awhitstabling we went. 

 Success! We have the Champagne and the wine will be bought on the morrow from La Belle France......but first we have the rehearsal for Saturday at the Church of Saints Peter and Paul in Ospringe

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Thursday and we're off to the continent.

Some of you will know I have history with birds.  

I have yet to meet anyone who has encountered bird strike whilst driving as often as I .
One memorable occasion whilst en route to France we were  on the M25, near South Mimms, heading for the ferry at Dover and a pigeon came through the windscreen which was very unpleasant for Pam  and generally making a right mess of the car. Birdstrike has happened to me 4  other times; not to the same extent as above which required being AAed to Canterbury for a windscreen, catching the last ferry to Calais and driving though France in the wee small hours arriving at our destination in Brittany about 4 a.m.

But most people have not had even one experience.

My reason for mentioning this distasteful matter is that on this trip they tried a new tactic.

Who did?

The sodding birds. That's who.

 I don't even know what kind it was. I know something.It wasn't a Big- arsed seagull with enough guano to whitewash the Albert Hall or a pigeon that can drop a cluster usually on a new suit, ten minutes before your job interview is to start.

Whatever it was flying over Calais last Thursday its timing was perfect.

Have you ever had duck and langoustines on the same plate. No? Nor me. But after torturing over the menu of the Brasserie De La Mer I settled on a salad. The French do a good salad and as my gouty knees were playing up I decided (or was it Pam?) that moules were not a good idea two days before the wedding.

So I chose a salad comprising as I say langoustines (6 of them) slices of duck breast, smoked salmon and the usual components of salad with a couple of unusual and tasty additions; capers and sypha  physsalis. Very tasty.

I was fortunately two thirds of the way through my meal accompanied by a small glass of Muscadet when Winged Commander R Suppards, Group Leader of the Calais Avian Squadron decided he needed to jettison his load and re-enact the bouncing bomb technique practised across France by this ace group -cue the Dumb Bastards March-da da da da di di da da-ok Ginger we're going in.

Loading up

Splat on my hat

     Crunch on my lunch

           Crap on my lap!

Pam was elsewhere at the time beating up a waiter and found it all very amusing. It's meant to be lucky apparently. Well I didn't feel very lucky as I picked my way through what was left. Needless to say I avoided the capers.

I don't know what a Great Bustard looks like but that's definitely similar to what I called that bugger.

Bird strike apart it was a good lunch, sat in the sunshine with Pam, looking lovely as she ploughed her way through her all day English breakfast and pint of Newcastle Brown ale.

We had gone to France, just for the day, primarily to buy wine for the wedding of Caz and Philip on the following Saturday.

The price of wine is still very competitive in Calais and the clincher is that both Majestic and Calais Wines will, if you buy £250 quids worth, pay your ferry fare (equivalent to £69)

Another bonus is that Majestic in Canterbury (or anywhere) will loan the champagne flutes for nothing as long as you show them the receipt from Calais. We hadn't actually bought any champagne from Majestic as Tesco had an offer on and gave 25% off for 6 bottles or more, but we did buy plenty of wine.

The crossing to Calais and back was idyllic and our timings were perfect. A great advantage of staying in Kent is you don't have to factor in the M25 so we only had to leave our cottage an hour before sailing and we arrived back in time to nip up to Deal to collect a sound system and to Canterbury Majestic for the glasses. My old estate car was well laden by the time we returned home. Job done. We were very glad of Tom Tom.

TomTom

especially when signposts are covered with hops

Friday was set-up day at the lovely Village Hall and after all the hard work to get the hall ready we all met up at the Woolpack for dinner and retired in good order ready for the wedding on the morrow (see above)

The morning after the wedding , along with many others we set to finish clearing up. I was a bit of a lightweight (?) in that my left knee which had been giving me grief all week was so painful every bloomin move hurt. I was more than happy to have the drive back to Canterbury and Deal with glasses and sound system and take the weight off my legs but I was aware I had not done my bit on the heavy jobs like shifting tables and a seemingly endless amount of chairs.
After the hall we still had to tidy up at the cottage and finally set off for Herts about 4 30. On board I poured a large Chivas Regal and didn't move again. A great week, a great weekend, a great wedding. I just wish I'd had the Moules now.